The battle in my head continues to rage on as if a compromise may never be met. Traumas revisited, with new patterns being set, whilst my mind doubts my worth and efforts. Often times, the creation of a problem wages forth, particularly when I have just made strides forward in establishing new perspectives and breaking down limitations that were only fed by false beliefs. Yes, it is then, they creep in and set forth a virus of thought permeating my mind.
While I am aware of every move being made, sometimes it feels as though I am not in control, rather these viruses that come along and set lose a fury of turmoil to test my growth. I also feel an awareness/knowing this is the purpose and path of being a human being, traveling in this world, so I extend grace to myself, while I fall on my knees and question how long this war shall continue with such intensity.
As I feel my expansion, I also feel the uncertainty of the world and those around me struggling with, perhaps similar things, yet rarely do we open our mouths to speak of such processes; rather we discuss basic, material, subjects that hold very little, if any meaning. Then we carry on and repeat our routines and living a life that seems to no longer work, yet we are unsure of how to change or start something so drastically different.
I call upon the great spirits and guides to bring me solace, so I may continue with this path, as I am called. I humbly accept this life in which I walk with bruising, aches and pains, and a heart that continues to expand beyond my understanding, leading me down a path of truth and honor.