Within intimate relationships, we are responsible for one’s self and no other, yet we behave as if this is not true. Within the beginning of a relationship, the excitement and curiosity offer an opportunity to slowly let parts of ourselves shift or change. An unspoken idea we somehow have subtle ownership or a justified attachment of one another, eventually creating challenging dynamics.

We might unintentionally diminish part of our light, as to not shine too brightly and overshadow those we love. We compromise our deep desires, set aside long-term dreams or goals, become less social, and even isolate ourselves from those who might notice. Most of this is done so slowly and subconsciously, we do not notice until we begin to feel a level of resentment or tension.

When we have a limited perspective of who we are and have not accepted all aspects of this, we may have a tendency to change pieces of ourselves that were never really meant to be changed within intimate relationships, specifically. Our personalities look different one to the other, while internally there are certain aspects of this continuously happening within relationships.

If we are here to face our fears, embrace all aspects of emotions and sensory response, all the while learning to love ourselves, how does this structure (societal expectation) allow us to be unapologetically and unconditionally ourselves? Relationships should encourage growth, inspiration and feel free unnecessary attachment. Vulnerable and courageous conversations should be had on the regular, as this is the place in which we support and love one another the deepest.

I am not suggesting relationships are bad, rather the structure we fall into seems to be up for some serious discussion and potential debate. We need to learn how to recognize, within ourselves, what our purpose is, speak without hesitation to these spaces and trust the process, no matter how difficult it may or may not be. Perhaps this very subject is the one most commonly overlooked, underestimated and ultimately justified. What conversation are you going to have today?